it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Quick, to the slutcave!
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
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