In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
