using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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