Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
