The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
