There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
sarcasm needs its own font
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
