I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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