Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
