Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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