I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
