Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
