Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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