I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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