You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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