I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
don't judge my taste in strippers
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
