We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I deserve to be covered in dicks
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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