let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I look better un-naked...
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
