I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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