I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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