Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
As shirtless as possible
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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