i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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