like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I didn't notice because vodka
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
