you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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