apparently the secret to your success is patron
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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