sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Randomize
