I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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