$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
