I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
