her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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