We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Randomize
