I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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