There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
