I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
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