fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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