Operation Purity has been aborted
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
do nipples grow back?
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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