no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
