How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
