Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
