what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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