why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
