Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
