We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
