we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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