I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
