what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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