Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
