I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Randomize
