You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
mom just said that her bf is good in bed. fml.
i am watching a movie about a vagina with teeth and then you sent that to me while im eating sushi.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I'm at about main and main street
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
