There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
