You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
